Friday, March 22, 2013

Marriage In Fiesta - Fatal's Take and some history...


We've all attended them, and probably all of us have been a part of them.  I'm talking about Weddings in Fiesta.  Whether you marry someone out of convenience, for the stat boost, for their companionship, or out of love, one thing's for sure... Marriages oftentimes carry great importance in the lifecycle of your character.  For me, especially.

I've been married twice in Fiesta, by twice, I mean to two different male players (I've married their alts together with mine also).  The first was when OutSpark first launched the marriage system back in 2008 and again (after divorcing my permanently banned first husband) when I returned in 2009.  At this point, I don't think I will be getting remarried.

My first husband was a fighter named "Mercurial", we had met farming/questing Zombie King in the Graveyard of the Dead back in the 59 cap.  We continued to play together up until he got permanently banned for a combination of offenses including chargebacks and account sharing.  Since there was no gifting system in place back then, it was common for players to share their login info with their "gifters" so the gifter could login from their computer and charge SparkCash.  The giftee would then change their password.  Unfortunately, this practice was extremely hazardous, and he got "hacked" (for lack of a better term even though he knowingly and willingly gave out his password) by people he considered to be friends.  After he was banned, he lost interest in the game and left.  He returned from time to time leveling up other characters, but our dynamic just wasn't the same anymore and we parted ways amicably.

In early 2009, I had struck up a playful friendship with a fighter named "StomyRain".  He was the guild master of an up-and-coming rival guild at the time, Ryekarayn.  While I was in NoMercy, probably Bijou's top guild at the time, we chatted a little bit, but nothing too personal.  I knew him only by reputation, which as most people from Bijou knew, he was kind of a hard-ass and a shrewd businessman.  When NoMercy eventually dissolved, Stormy was there to offer me membership into his guild.  While I had considered it strongly, my heart was still with NoMercy and the friendships I had forged there.  I decided to set off on my own and run my own guild for a time, ChaoticEmbrace.  Some of the old NoMercy members followed me here, others splintered off into their own guilds and some joined our old rivals.  After a few months and never really recovering from the loss of NoMercy, I departed Isya.

After my own 8-month hiatus back in 2009, I returned to Isya to a new level cap and many of my oldest friends gone.  However, Stormy was still around.  He was kind enough to show me around, help me level up a bit, and mostly just encourage me.  At the time, it's what I needed most.  His invitation to join his guild was always open, there was no pressure, just let him know when/if I was ready.  Eventually, I came around.

We continued to play together, taking time away from our "mains" and focus on leveling up alts together since his Gladiator was already at the 105 level cap.  We went through Crystal Castle together as a Mage/Cleric duo and had a lot of fun with it.  We flew through KKP runs and Trumpy Remains, conquered Dragon's Tomb and grinded a ton of Lava Gargoyles back in Swamp of Dawn before the mobs were relocated.  Eventually we both hit level 100 at around the same time.  We took some time off away from Bijou and traveled to Cypion, where we switched roles and he played the Cleric role.  I thought it was funny, he's a terrible cleric.

The timeline is a little blurry, but we did get married.  However, I never did marry his "main".  His main was already married to an inactive Warlock named Kristeen, she would log in maybe once or twice a month.  The two of them were friends, but to what extent, I never really knew.  I don't think I really asked.  Stormy did say that he talked to her about divorcing, but she said she would be depressed about it even though she no longer played much.  Again, not one to rock the boat, I took the high ground and told Stormy to stay married to her and that we'd figure it out.  He decided to level up another fighter with the intent to marry me.  He eventually did, he leveled up a Knight and we got married.  We have 3 sets of characters that are married and 1 that was engaged (our Tricksters), but for some reason we never pulled the trigger.  When people ask, I consider "StormyRain" my husband and it will remain that way.

Stormy has been inactive for a very long time as he focused on his real-life business, I think he stopped playing around August of 2010.  He returned briefly when the Tricksters were released, but his interest in the game waned and he was extremely busy.  We had spent so many hours together and had so many great memories shared, whether he's inactive or not, I stay committed to him in-game.

I have so much respect for Stormy the character, and Jensen the player behind the avatar, that I wouldn't dream of divorcing him.  My avatars are and will remain linked to his.  I don't need the stat boost, I don't need the convenience of a summon, I don't need the items or SparkCash that people have tried to bribe me with, the memories are far too important.  It's funny, I wouldn't expect the same of him had our roles been reversed, but I do take solace in knowing that he would probably honor me in the same way.

Since my return I've been asked several times, especially on my SharpShooter since she is technically still "single", if I wanted to get married, but I always respectfully decline.  Even though Faytal has never married, she will continue to forge her own path by herself, again in honor of Stormy.

Maybe you think I'm silly and taking this all too far, but personally I don't think so.  I'm not one to trifle with relationships, even in-game.  I'm not one to casually throw around affectionate terms like "hun" and "babe", those are reserved for the man in my life.  When male friends call me by those terms even in casual conversation, I respectfully ask that they don't, I'm just not comfortable with it.  They're often taken aback by it, but respect my wishes and heed my request.

So, while the conveniences of marriage are definitely tempting, it's just not worth dishonoring the man I've come to respect the most.  FatalLace and StormyRain will be forever linked, from those days long ago until Fiesta finally shuts it doors.  FLSR.


7 comments:

  1. Too many memories babe... too many.

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    1. ^this pervert still lurking around. I missed reading your blog Fatal, glad you've decided to pick it up again :D (late reply to this post that was made like..last month)

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  2. Love this post.
    Also, welcome back to the game fatal :) (although I dont carry the laceface tag anymore, i still consider myself "Forever An 'Alt'")

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  3. I know I'm probably a bit weird for marrying friends, but it seems to have worked out the best. Shirp and my SS have been married since.. practically '09. I'm actually kinda surprised I still keep in touch with some people from Fiesta even though we all don't play.

    I agree with your post, it really is the memories... all the hours spent and all the inside jokes that my friends and I made that I miss the most about Fiesta. I couldn't replace those with anything.

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  4. Not silly. I'm still married on my 92 Cleric to my rl husband who is only 64 and rarely ever gets on. Same with my archer; I knew my friend wouldn't play on her fighter that much anymore, but I still married her on it, for meanings other than ig convenience.

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  5. Gotta say all of your posts are absolutely genius (especially when you go all intellectual like with the attendence system review you also did). But, I really like this post in particular it really reminds me how even though Fiesta isin't exactly the best game out there, it still was for me and I am sure many of us older players the home of many wonderful memories like Tempy said.

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  6. I totally respect for the way you treat your relationships with such care. I have been married on my main character 3 times. Each of them was a different relationship. The first was a guy from guild, second was a girl of another guild and the third was a friend I had met ig. Each one was more opinionated then the last. To me, the casual players were far easier to let go, however the ones that were more meaningful you don't ever forget. Who can say which is better to marry for buff or out of relationship? One thing I would say, whether you meet someone in rl or ig, real relationships are not trifle.

    Thanks for a thought provoking post Fatal.

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